Film: The Best Movies of 1968 -- Final Installment

Here's the last installment of my flashback to the best movies of 1968. You can find Part One and Part Two here.


11. The Lion in Winter

In the previous post I wrote about the feminist message inherent in Rachel, Rachel, Rosemary’s Baby and Funny Girl. The Lion in Winter joins the parade led by the indomitable Katherine Hepburn as the scheming trophy Queen, up against Peter O’ Toole as her scheming King, young Timothy Dalton as a scheming pretender to the throne and young Anthony Hopkins as one of the scheming princes. Indeed Hepburn would get an Oscar for her performance. O’Toole is Henry II, convening a Christmas Eve family conclave to decide on an heir. Christmas With The Kranks this ain’t.



12. The Thomas Crown Affair

Though Bullitt gets all the action typical of a Steve McQueen flick in 1968, it’s little more than a spectacular car chase with a movie appended to the beginning. The Thomas Crown Affair is something else, with a cerebral McQueen masterminding a tense romance with Faye Dunaway and a daring caper. Mercurial director Norman Jewison is at his best along with editor and future director Hal Ashby (Harold and Maude, Shampoo) and cinematography wunderkind Haskell Wexler. The use of split-screen was groundbreaking and the trio throw every modish effect at the screen like a compendium of late 60s angles and tricks. Though it’s a film about brainy planning, it’s best enjoyed with the cerebellum in neutral.



13. Targets

Peter Bogdonavich however, approaches film with the proto-Tarantino-esque eye of a student of the form with a deep knowledge of its history. Targets, his first film, is one of those accidental works of art turned out by Roger Corman’s exploitation factory. Corman launched a lot of careers (Jack Nicholson’s being only one of the most notable) and he inaugurated Bogdonavich’s by gifting him 20 minutes of footage from a Boris Karloff film he had on the shelf and Karloff himself who still had two days left on his contract with Corman.

From this is launched the haunting story of a washed-up horror movie actor making a personal appearance to promote his latest schlock film, and the real-life horror of the all-American boy next door who seems to like guns a bit too much and people a bit too little. Karloff gives one of the best performances of his career.



14. Witchfinder General

British director Michael Reeves was just 29 when he died in 1969. Before dying he left one masterpiece starring another actor better known for schlock horror and like Targets released in the United States with Roger Corman’s help. Vincent Price is terrific, controlled and ham-free in the disturbing Witchfinder General, a film about the evil inherent in religious fanaticism. Dick Cheney ought to pay close attention to the undertones here where torture and brutality and the rightness of might all signify the work of the devil.



15. If…

Bad schoolboys! Lindsey Anderson’s dark satiric gem guts British society from the inside out, using a prestigious private school as it’s stand-in. Who better than young rebellious Malcolm MacDowell to lead a band of students in escalating acts of transgression which are met by increasingly outrageous punishments. The ending is shockingly prescient for today’s viewers though considered over-the-top at the time. Totally brilliant.

Film: Flashback! The Best Movies of 1968 Part One

Compiled by Noah Mallin

In an ongoing cultural project here at POSAS I'm delving into the past to bring flashbacks from pop culture's musty byways. We're starting 40 years ago with 1968 and the best movies of that year. They are in no order except the arbitrary whims of yours truly. I have of course called in friend of the blog Cletus to weigh in as well. To the list!


1. The Producers

The story of The Producers is not unlike…well… the story of The Producers. The film flopped on its original release but subsequently garnered a Supporting Actor Oscar nomination for Gene Wilder and a win for writer/director Mel Brooks in the screenplay category. It has since gone on to great success as a hit Broadway musical and a not-so-hit film version of the play. The difference is that, as far as anyone knows, Brooks didn't plan it this way.

Zero Mostel plays Max Bialystock, seedy down-on-his-luck producer who resorts to seducing old ladies to fund his shows. Gene Wilder is nebbishy Leo Bloom, the accountant who muses that one could actually make more money from a flop than a hit. From that seed comes Bialystock’s final solution: a Broadway musical called Springtime For Hitler.



2. Planet of The Apes

Planet of The Apes is one of the archetypal sci-fi as social commentary films. In a year when it seemed the world was falling apart, riven by assassinations and wars and riots, Charlton Heston lands on a faraway planet where the men are speechless beasts and the apes are in charge. Franklin Schaffner’s film was a massive hit, in no small part because the action and the spectacular visuals allow the socio-political implications to remain strictly optional – at least until
the unforgettable ending.

3. Petulia

Richard Lester’s Petulia, shot by Nicolas Roeg, is an all-but-forgotten gem. The film is a time –fragmented dark romantic comedy that is also a cutting dissection of consumerist American society at the height of the Vietnam War. The quick-cuts and flashy editing are of the time but can also be seen as influences on directors both good (Almodovar, Soderburg) and bad (Michael Bay). Julie Christie is at her best as the offbeat title character, looking for deeper meaning in a shifting world, George C. Scott is her older lover and Richard Chamberlain is deeply creepy as her husband.

The Vietnam War on people’s televisions contrasts with their Great Society surroundings and San Francisco in all it’s counter-culture fault lines. There is also some notable footage of both Big Brother and The Holding Company and The Grateful Dead performing live.



4. Once Upon a Time in The West

Sergio Leone finally got a big American budget to match his John Ford-esque ambitions with Once Upon a Time in The West. A big long epic, it’s a film stuffed with the contrast between the tiny detail and the sweeping long view that are the hallmark of Leone’s style. There’s no Eastwood here as in Leone’s three previous spaghetti western classics but Henry Fonda is superb cast against type as the heavy, versus Charles Bronson as Leone’s prototypical existential hero.



5. Night of The Living Dead

George Romero’s Night of The Living Dead is the low-budget flipside to the big-budget ’68 hit Planet of The Apes. Like Apes, Night of The Living Dead is a genre film that also packs a great deal of social commentary into its wrapper. It’s also the blueprint for the modern zombie film as carried on by the likes of 28 Days Later, among others.

Film: An Alternate Universe Far Far Away, Where Saul Bass and George Lucas Team Up

Saul Bass is one of the greatest graphic artists of the twentieth century, designing iconic credit sequences for such films as The Man With The Golden Arm. Now some smarty, arty pants has imagined what the Star Wars credit sequence would have looked like a la Bass:



Here's the actual factual Bass' sequence for It's a Mad Mad Mad Mad Mad World:


And his famous Anatomy of a Murder:

Film: New Line Gets the Axe From WB

New Line, the former independent film studio founded 40 years ago by Bob Shaye, is being shuttered by corporate parent Warner Bros. The New Line label will still be used and its current slate of films will be released but it will no longer function as a separate entity.

New Line started off distributing off the shelf films and midnight movie fare by pioneering auteurs like John Waters. The 80s saw them scoring with genre fare like the Nightmare on Elm Street movies. Their biggest triumph came with Peter Jackson's ambitious Lord of The Rings trilogy which grossed billions worldwide. Shaye would subsequently have a very public falling-out with Jackson over profit reporting that grew to entangle the possible Hobbit prequel.

Film: Oscars are Spoiled For Choice -- as are the Soundies!

This year's Oscar picks are the toughest I can remember in a number of categories. Still, blogging is all about making the tough choices -- that is when it's not about carpal tunnel syndrome. The following are my picks in several major categories. I would toss my hat into the increasingly crowded prognostication ring but really, does anyone know, outside of a few categories that seem to be a lock? So once again, thses are my faves out of the noms but not who I think will neccessarily win. Thus I call these my "Soundies":


ANIMATED FEATURE
"Persepolis" - (Sony Pictures Classics) Marjane Satrapi and Vincent Paronnaud
"Ratatouille" - (Pixar; Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures Distribution) Brad Bird
"Surf’s Up" - (Sony Pictures Releasing) Ash Brannon and Chris Buck

This is a tough one, mainly because of Persepolis and Ratatouille. I agree with the sentiment that Ratatouille could have been a best picture contender, it's certainly a better film than Aladdin, but then so is Persepolis. Persepolis has more timely political and personal themes, dealing as it does with the Islamic revolution in Iran and the effect it has on one woman growing up. Ratatouille also had strong resonance though, dealing as it does with creativity and in remarkably similar ways to Persepolis, issues of identity and gentrification. In the end, I'm giving my Soundie to Brad Bird's Ratatouille based on the stunning animation and the scope of the themes the film covers. Once again he proves that big budget animation doesn't have to mean tired pop-cultural references and lame singing and dancing interludes. Surf's Up simply isn't in the same league as the other two films, despite not being bad at all.


ADAPTED SCREENPLAY
Paul Thomas Anderson - "There Will Be Blood"
Ethan & Joel Coen - "No Country for Old Men"
Christopher Hampton - "Atonement"
Ronald Harwood - "The Diving Bell and the Butterfly"
Sarah Polley - "Away from Her"

Another tough set of choices, each of these have something to recommend them. Atonement is hamstrung in most categories by being the most conventional pick, though Away From Her is also fairly straightforward. Sarah Polley, who is better known as an actress, both wrote and directed Away From Her and this is a chance to reward her for pulling off a tough hat trick. In the end though, I have to give it up for the Coen brothers, simply for the audacity to end their film the way they do and to confound every expectation set up by No Country For Old Men.



ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY
Brad Bird - "Ratatouille"
Diablo Cody - "Juno"
Tony Gilroy - "Michael Clayton"
Tamara Jenkins - "The Savages"
Nancy Oliver - "Lars and the Real Girl"

The Oscar word is that first timer Diablo Cody is a lock to win this, if only to see what outfit she'll wear. To be fair Juno is an excellent screenplay with a whole host of memorable lines. Bird's Ratatouille is expertly constructed as both entertainment and thoughtful meditation, able to charm an 8 year old or an 80 year old, no mean feat. Then there is Tony Gilroy's Michael Clayton, a film the veteran screenwriter was able to use as his directing debut and which expertly subverts the thriller genre. I'm a fan of Tamara Jenkins and the personal nature of her storytelling and I enjoyed Lars and the Real Girl though I don't know if it's central high concept is quite enough to warrant inclusion here. In another tough one, I'm giving the Soundie to Gilroy for his delicatly balanced Clayton.


DIRECTOR
Paul Thomas Anderson - "There Will Be Blood"
Ethan Coen & Joel Coen - "No Country For Old Men"
Tony Gilroy - "Michael Clayton"
Jason Reitman - "Juno"
Julian Schnabel - "The Diving Bell And The Butterfly"

Gnahhh! How to choose between these?! Schnabel is stylish and makes some clever choices but the lack of a best picture nod is a tipoff that this isn't quite there. Juno is very well made and young Reitman does an admirable job balancing the tricky tone of the material. Clayton is a remarkable debut, filled with smart set-ups and shots and sequences like Clooney's Graduate-esque taxi ride. Blood is an expertly shot and conceived epic that still finds time for claustrophobic mania. This brings us once again to the Coens, who manipulate sound (or it's absence), light (or it's absence) and the audience with an uncommon skill. The Soundie goes to No Country .


PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTOR IN A SUPPORTING ROLE
Casey Affleck in "The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford" (Warner Bros.)Javier Bardem in "No Country for Old Men" (Miramax and Paramount Vantage)
Hal Holbrook in "Into the Wild" (Paramount Vantage and River Road Entertainment)
Philip Seymour Hoffman in "Charlie Wilson’s War" (Universal)
Tom Wilkinson in "Michael Clayton" (Warner Bros.)

Casey Affleck has had a very good year, both in the western with a title nearly as long as its bloated running time and in big brother's directorial debut Gone Baby Gone. Philip Seymour Hoffman won for Capote in a performance I found to be just short of dreadful yet he too has had a very good year in both The Savages and War. Hal Holbrook is touching in Into The Wild, and it could be the very last time voters get to mark him off. Tom Wilkinson is extraordinary in a film full of great performances, walking the fine line between lucidity insanity fueled mysticism. Then we come to the favorite, Bardem. Sometimes the favorite is anointed for a reason and Bradem utterly transforms his charming handsome self into a dead-eyed, bowlcut killer. His performance is likely to become iconic.



PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTRESS IN A SUPPORTING ROLE
Cate Blanchett in "I’m Not There" (The Weinstein Company)
Ruby Dee in "American Gangster" (Universal)
Saoirse Ronan in "Atonement" (Focus Features)
Amy Ryan in "Gone Baby Gone" (Miramax)
Tilda Swinton in "Michael Clayton" (Warner Bros.)

I've always thought kids should get their own category for acting. Every year some tyke like Haley Joel Osment gets nominated and gets one step closer to peaking too damn early. So Saoirse Ronan is out. Blanchett is making a career out of impersonations of famous people -- look out Rich Little! That being said her Dylan is pretty damn great. Ruby Dee is wonderful, but she's in that movie for maybe 5 minutes? Amy Ryan is always dynamite in my book -- you want layers? She's got 'em, plus she's worked her butt off in the industry and according to The Onion's AV Guide dropping off her laundry is the only sign of "making it" she's noticed. This brings us to Tilda Swinton's gimlet-eyed clammy skinned performance in Michael Clayton, in its own way the counterpart of Javier Bardem's bad guy in No Country. Except where Jardem is playing an elemental force of nature, Swinton is all-too human. Swinton gets the Soundie.


PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTRESS IN A LEADING ROLE
Cate Blanchett in "Elizabeth: The Golden Age" (Universal)
Julie Christie in "Away from Her" (Lionsgate)
Marion Cotillard in "La Vie en Rose" (Picturehouse)
Laura Linney in "The Savages" (Fox Searchlight)
Ellen Page in "Juno" (Fox Searchlight)

The relative thinness of this category suggests that Hollywood really does have a dearth of good roles for woman. It's also notable that two of the big Best Picture noms have very small roles for women. Cate Blanchett is always a treat but this film was bad and she has been and will be better in better films. Laura Linney is terrific and funny and messed up in the sibling tragedy of The Savages. Marion Cotillard does a remarkable job of transforming herself into Edith Piaf in La Vie En Rose. Julie Christie is always a welcome presence onscreen, and carries Sarah Polley's Away From Her with a tough performance. Which leave this year's ingenue, Ellen Page, who will have a hard time topping her acerbic yet vulnerable performnce in Juno, which gets the Soundie.


PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTOR IN A LEADING ROLE
George Clooney in "Michael Clayton" (Warner Bros.)
Daniel Day-Lewis in "There Will Be Blood" (Paramount Vantage and Miramax)
Johnny Depp in "Sweeney Todd The Demon Barber of Fleet Street" (DreamWorks and Warner Bros.,Distributed by DreamWorks/Paramount)
Tommy Lee Jones in "In the Valley of Elah" (Warner Independent)
Viggo Mortensen in "Eastern Promises" (Focus Features)

Mortensen did the accent route in Cronenberg's Eastern Promises, not to mention the whole nude fight scene approach. It's a brave performance. Tommy Lee Jones also had a strong year but his nomination comes for the wrong film, as touching as he is in Elah. Depp sings, he dances, he sports his bride of Frankenstein hair -- it's another fine turn for the ex- 21 Jump Street-er. Clooney gives a sensitive and tricky performnce in Clayton, his scene with the horses was one of the best of the year. Which brings us to Daniel Day-Lewis. Some people found him a bit hammy in Blood but this physically challenging, bravura role shows why the man commands the screen. He's magnificent and magnetic, garnering himself a Soundie.


BEST PICTURE
"Atonement" (Focus Features)A Working Title ProductionTim Bevan, Eric Fellner and Paul Webster, Producers
"Juno" (Fox Searchlight)A Dancing Elk Pictures, LLC ProductionLianne Halfon, Mason Novick and Russell Smith, Producers
"Michael Clayton" (Warner Bros.)A Clayton Productions, LLC ProductionSydney Pollack, Jennifer Fox and Kerry Orent, Producers
"No Country for Old Men" (Miramax and Paramount Vantage)A Scott Rudin/Mike Zoss ProductionScott Rudin, Ethan Coen and Joel Coen, Producers
"There Will Be Blood" (Paramount Vantage and Miramax)A JoAnne Sellar/Ghoulardi Film Company ProductionJoAnne Sellar, Paul Thomas Anderson and Daniel Lupi, Producers

Atonement is the kind of film that used to be prime Oscar-bait years ago. The truth is that among the more innovative films in the category this year it comes up short. Juno is a wonderful film, funny and sweet, but it lacks the impact of some of the heavier films in this category. Any of the remaining three would be great choices but I have to give the Soundie to Blood with it's brutal dissection of greed.

Film: Oscars -- What Goes Into Good Editing?

Slate.com has a great feature on the Oscar nominated films in the editing category. Mark Helfrich, Academy member and film editor and director explains what makes each clip interesting from an editing standpoint. He does make the inference that Sean Penn's Into The Wild is something of an "editor's movie", but he steers clear of a favorite. Here's the clip:

Film: According To My Wife -- Addendum to the Supplemental

My patient and virtuous wife wisely feels that the choice of "16 Going on 17" to represent The Sound of Music in POS(AS)'s Valentine's Day movie extravaganza gave short shrift to the burning eroticism of Julie Andrews' and Chritopher Plummer's performances as Maria and the Captain. Of course she's right and to rectify this, here is a clip of them getting all horned up singing "Something Good":

Film: Great Celluloid Presidents

Here in the United States it is President's Day, which celebrates the merging of two President's birthdays into one day that is neither of their actual birthdays but which meets the goal of maximum productivity by minimizing excess holidays and placing them, whenever possible, on a Monday.

With that kind of patriotic ferver in mind I present a sampling of cinematic Presidents, with a real one mixed in just to keep us on our toes. Can you spot the real President? Good luck!

1) Henry Fonda as Abe Lincoln in Young Mr. Lincoln

One of Director John Ford's greatest films, and one of lead actor Henry Fonda's best performances. We are introduced to Lincoln in his pre-Presidential years (an origin story as the studio heads might say). Rather than stoic be-bearded stuffiness we get lanky, canny Matlock-y sharp country lawyer and yes, tragic lover. Here's a great scene in which he visits the grave of his early love.


2) Dan Hedaya as Richard Nixon in Dick

I'll take Hedaya over Anthony Hopkin's Nixon in a Tricky Dick-off anyday. In a lot less time than Oliver Stone devoted to one of our worst Presidents in his bloated opus Nixon, Hedaya captures the man's self-loathing and deep insecurity, not to mention his paranoia and vindictiveness. And it's a comedy!

3) Jimmy Carter as Jimmy Carter in Used Cars

Ah, the malaise years. The Carter presidency was marked by crises: gas, inflation, hostage, confidence. That deep well of cynicism was tapped by Robert Zemeckis' farce Used Cars. In the scene below, the guys at one used car lot mess with the owners of the other by hacking into a televised Presidential address with an ad set at their rival's lot. Part of what makes this hilarious is the use of a real speech by Carter to frame the ad.


4) John Travolta as Governer Jack Stanton in Primary Colors

For most of Mike Nichols' Primary Colors Jack Stanton is a governor running for his party's primary nomination. However the last scene in the film shows he and his first lady (a fantastic Emma Thompson as Hillary to his Bill) dancing at the inaguaral ball so this counts. Playing a character as flawed as the film he's in, you can't help loving him even as you flinch from some of his excesses and wonder where ambition meets expedience meets compassion. Yes, it's Bill Clinton in a nutshell:


5) Peter Sellers as President Merkin Muffley in Dr. Strangelove

Dr. Strangelove is one of the greatest cinematic satires ever and its President, played to perfection by Peter Sellers, is key to what makes Stanley Kubrick's cold war masterpiece work. President Muffley is a stickler for protocol and finding a reasonable solution to any problem. Clearly modeled after 50s Democratic nominee Adlai Stevenson, Muffley's measured approach to the insanity around him begins to seem somewhat insane itself. The "straight" version of this same scenario came out later the same year as Fail-Safe and just compare Henry Fonda's compassionate performance as the President to what Sellar's does with essentially the same material. Here's an outstanding scene in which President Muffley calls the Russian Premier to explain the hideous mistake that is unfolding:

Film: According To My Wife -- Supplemental

My talented and sassy wife feels that she missed a key film in yesterday's Valentine's Day themed list. No, not Ernest Takes a Lover (the only film in the Ernest series set in France and directed by Eric Rohmer).

The Sound of Music has it all: singing, Nazis, children, nuns. Most of all it has what my wife describes as a "steamy" romance between uppity would-be nun Julie Andrews and stern disciplinarian Christopher Plummer as Captain Van Trapp. Then for the youngsters there's the romance between Von Trapp's daughter and a young German soldier.

Here's "Sixteen going on Seventeen", which Charmain Carr performs on a sprained ankle! The bandages were digitally removed for the DVD release:

Film: Thanksgiving Turkeys Part 2: Electric Boogaloo

Here are five more filmic disaster areas -- turkeys if you will -- to celebrate Thanksgiving in style. To see the first five click here.

1) Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot – Two stars cross paths in this film – Sylvester Stallone on his way to better things like Tango and Cash, and rising star Estelle Getty – just finding fame on TV's The Golden Girls. This is like the action movie version of a bad Woody Allen routine. Check out the uncomfortably Oedipal shower scene in the trailer below.


2) Megaforce – So many questions. Yes, that is Barry Bostwick, the mayor of Spin City, wearing a disturbingly form-fitting Lycra jumpsuit and a shit-eating grin. Yes indeed, that is Michael Beck, star of Warriors and Xanadu in a matching jumpsuit that facilitates a full rib count. Yes, sadly that is a "flying" motorcycle. Yes, this movie was actually theatrically released and is not a parody. No, that is not Will Ferrell in the tank. No, those reaction shots on the plane do not look even remotely believable. No, motorcycles cannot fly. No, there is no way Netflix is allowed to send anything this toxic in the mail. Enjoy this lovingly assembled lowlights reel:


3) Can’t Stop the Music – The cast list says it all : Olympian Bruce Jenner (in a pair of shorts that would make Tom of Finland blush)! Steve Guttenberg! The Village People!


4) Jack Frost – Those workaholic backstabbing serial-divorcing Hollywood types persist in making movies about taking it easy, enjoying the good things like family and your spouse, being nice and not working so darn hard! Michael Keaton’s entry in this genre has him as a workaholic blues musician named Jack Frost who gets his come-uppance by dying and being re-incarnated as a talking snowman. Creepy! There is an almost as bad horror movie with the same name and the same premise only the protag is an overworked serial killer. This one is scarier. Behold!


5) Goin' Ape! - This was an important transition movie for Tony Danza -- from squat hairy simian co-star Danny DeVito on Taxi to the multiple squat hairy simian costars of Bobby Berosini's Orangutans in Cannonball Run 2. The whole gang -- Danza, DeVito, and Orangutans join forces in this dire inheritance "comedy." Observe:

Film: Thanksgiving Turkeys -- Five Films Hardly Worth The Stuffing

In honor of the Thanksgiving holiday coming up this week here in the United States I'm serving a platter of turkey. A bunch of flicks that will make you thankful not to be watching. They are not in order of painful or -lessness.

1 ) The Butterfly Effect – This ludicrous exercise in time travel and what-iffery is like Donnie Darko’s retarded half-brother. Never mind that the movie can’t even stick to its own convoluted time travel rules. Forget the pop Abel Ferrara approach which gives us pedophilia, animal torture, prostitution, and prison rape. The key to this movie is that it allows Ashton Kutcher to stretch really really wide as an actor. This is akin to allowing George W. Bush to stretch as a humanitarian or Susan Smith to stretch as a mother. They just simply aren’t that elastic. If I have to peg just one highlight it’s when Kutcher gets punked by some ill-advised past changing and is transformed into a paraplegic. Unintentional comic effect follows—behold!


2) Superman Returns – Director Bryan Singer's wonderful film The Usual Suspects is looking more like a fluke every day. After two so-so X-Men films he did a “re-imagining” of the Superman franchise. By re-imagining the studio obviously meant ‘crap remake” because that’s what this is. Brandon Routh has no original beats of his own as either Clark Kent or Superman – he merely apes the late Christopher Reeve’s iconic performance in the 1978 original. The music, whole scenes and bits of dialogue, Marlon Brando, the opening title sequence, are lifted from the earlier superior film. The parts that have been changed have not been changed for the better. Kate Bosworth is hardly believable as a mother or a hard boiled reporter. Kevin Spacey’s coat is way more interesting than his performance and Parker Posey, oh Parker Posey. You were much, much better in Josie and The Pussycats. Everything is bigger, the movie is longer, the boredom is inevitable. Here’s Kevin Spacey doing his best to make us admire Gene Hackman:


3)The Dark Backward – The Dark Backward is a cheat – a film that is quirky and culty because it so badly wants to be seen as quirky and culty. What it really is, is crappy. The description alone ought to raise several red flags. Count ‘em off with me – Judd Nelson Stars (flag 1) as comedian Marty Malt in a dystopian alternate universe (flag 2). Malt starts to grow a third arm (big honking huge red flag number 3) which best friend Bill Paxton decides to promote with the help of slimy agent Rob Lowe (flag 4) and promoter Wayne Newton (flag 5). Even this fails to capture the grating boob-osity of Paxton’s performance, the bad Terry Gilliam in grade school style production design, the prancing panoply of overacting that this film contains. Also there’s a guy licking a corpse at a dump and a fat lady orgy, both featuring Paxton prominently. This one has a cult, and they should all be ashamed. Horrible. Here’s the trailer.



4) Highlander 2: The Quickening – The first Highlander was an amiable overdirected b-movie, plenty of 80s fun. This sequel hits the trifecta of bad filmmaking from screenplay to lighting to acting to editing. Don’t cheat and watch the director’s cut on the expanded DVD, the original’s on there also just waiting to be mocked. The expanded cut tries to fix what ails the movie which only makes a spectacular object lesson in what can go wrong while making a film into a sub par dreary scifi-er. To start with, licensing issues led to a new backstory which makes this a sequel to a film that can't be referenced. Got that? So instead of a race of immortals (silly but charming) they are, wait for it, immortals from outer space (silly but stupid). Also, the movie is set in the future but the budget was clearly blown on Sean Connery’s 15 minutes of screen time. The solution? A voice over explaining that “Everything here is old, we drive old cars…” Oooo-kayyy. This at least is enjoyably bad, in a jaw-dropping how could this be released way. Enjoy Connery’s resurrection (which makes no sense) here:


5) Oh Heavenly Dog! – A film so bad that YouTube has no scenes from it. Chevy Chase plays a dead P.I. re-incarnated in the body of Benji the dog in this early entry in the 80s switcheroo flicks. Jane Seymour is the woman who inspires some really unsavory canine lust and Omar Sharif is the bad guy who ought to fire his agent tout suite! The poster alone makes me want to hurt myself. The folks at Benji inc. later recut it to drop a lot of the innuendo and naughty grownup talk so original cuts are rare.

Culture: Sexiest Man Dead 2007

People magazine just announced their annual Pavlovian bell ring, serving up fresh beefcake with their Sexist Man Alive issue (it's Matt Damon this year). We here at POSAS decided to up the ante a bit. Even though my statistical experts tell me that there are more people alive on earth now than have ever died, it doesn't feel true. As Stephen Colbert would say, it lacks truthiness. I think the real challenge is to name the Sexiest Man Dead 2007-- and that's just what we intend to do here at POSAS intend to do.

The Sexiest Man Dead for 2007 is Cary Grant.

This years Sexiest Man Dead gave new meaning to the phrase "swings both ways", doing a fair impression of a kitchen door in a busy upscale restaurant. Grant was married five times, including to actress Dyan Cannon and lived with actor Randolph Scott for many years.

His suave sense of style, cool invented mid-Atlantic accent, and facility with both comedy and drama made him a star worldwide. Born Archibald Leach in Bristol England in 1904 he remained a movie star from the mid 1930s until the dawn of the seventies.

Among our favorite films of his Sylvia Scarlett (1935) with Katherine Hepburn, Topper (1937), The Awful Truth (1937), Bringing Up Baby (1938), and Holiday(1938) which both re-teamed him with Hepburn, Gunga Din (1939), His Girl Friday (1939), The Philadelphia Story (1940) with Hepburn and Jimmy Stewart, his first teaming with Hitchcock Suspicion (1941) , Arsenic and Old Lace (1944), Notorious (1946) with Ingrid Bergman and Hitchcock again, The Bishop's Wife (1947), To Catch a Thief (1954) directed by Hitch with a radiant Grace Kelly, An Affair to Remember (1957), North by Northwest (1959) his most iconic Hitchcock film, and Charade teaming him with another Hepburn -- Audrey.

Ladies and gentleman, POSAS Sexiest Man Dead 2007 Cary Grant!

Here's future POSAS SMD nominee Michael Caine on Grant:

Books: Adaptation Auteur Ira Levin Dies at 78

Ira Levin, who wrote a series of high concept airplane reads that in turn spurned a series of high concept films, died on Monday in Manhattan. The most successful critical and commercial adaptation was Rosemary's Baby, published as a novel in 1967 and adapted into Roman Polanski's classic psych-horror the same year. There was also A Kiss Before Dying, done once with Robert Wagner, Jeffrey Hunter, Joanne Woodward and Mary Astor in the late 50's and then again in 1991 with Matt Dillon, Sean Young and Max Von Sydow -- The Stepford Wives chillingly done in 1975 and then stupidly done with Nicole Kidman in 2004 -- The Boys From Brazil's bravura scenery chewing from Gregory Peck and Laurence Olivier -- and the execrable Sliver done with Sharon Stone and one of the lesser Baldwins. He also was a prolific playwright best known for Deathtrap which also made it to the big screen with Michael Caine and Christopher Reeve.

As the list above suggests Levin was a kind of proto-Michael Crichton, boldly jumping into futuristic ideas like robotics and surveillance buildings while also dealing with bogeymen like the devil and cloned Nazis. Here is the New York Times obit.

Film: Stepfather Joins the H-Wood Regurgitation Parade

Dylan Walsh: Not only not my real father...not even my real stepfather!

Just last week I was having dinner with my lovely wife and a few friends at my mother's apartment and talk turned, naturally enough, to the 1987 Joseph Ruben Directed b-thriller The Stepfather. Friend George, like myself, is a big fan of the Terry O' Quinn (Locke from Lost) starrer about a teenage girl (Jill Schoelen) who starts to suspect that the law and order family guy who's swept Mom (Shelley Hack) off her feet may be a serial family killer. George pointed out (quite rightly) the subversive Reagen-era commentary inherent in O'Quinn's ultra-tough love performance.

Well wouldn't you know the green minded folks in Hollywood have finally gotten around to recycling The Stepfather -- This time starring Nip/Tuck's Dylan Walsh as the stepfather and Sela Ward as mom. It's directed by...oh who cares. Really is there such a dearth of ideas in the world that we have to go to second string 80's films for remakes? The thing that really tees me off about this is when I'm cruising through my cable guide and I see Bad News Bears and I'm all psyched for some Walter Matthau and boom! It's Billy Bob Thornton. Oh The Hitcher's on, maybe I'm in time to see Jennifer Jason Leigh tied between a tractor and its trailer and who wouldn't want to torture C. Thomas Howell but...oh crap it's a bunch of actors I could care less about. Seriously Hollywood -- before I have to turn on Cinemax to see The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai starring Sean William Scott and Sophia Bush -- stop the madness!

Here's the trailer for the real Stepfather:

Film: The Top 10 Sweatiest Movies

POSAS is bringing onboard a one man affiliate and font of information, our resident possum puree specialist Cletus who has generously contributed to the following list. Think you can get sweatier (non-porn please)? Let us know! To the list...

1) Cool Hand Luke (1967) - Paul Newman covered in sweat in the definitive men in prison flick.


2) 12 Angry Men (1957)- Sidney Lumet's courtroom drama, sans a/c. The arguments get heated and so does the sequestered jury. There's more sheen here than in Bobby...



3) Body Heat (1981) - Kathleen Turner and William Hurt steam up the screen in this neo-noir classic.


4)Do The Right Thing (1989) Spike Lee's masterpiece of racial tension takes place on the hottest day of summer. Here's a nice relaxing scene:


5) Palmetto (1998) - Another hot neo-noir, this time with Woody Harrelson, Elisabeth Shue and Gina Gershon


6) Alien (1979) - Ridley Scott's monster on a spaceship tour de force.


7)D.O.A. (1950) - Accept no substitutes (ie the Dennis Quaid/ Meg Ryan remake) this is the ultimate in "You only have x amount of time to live!" flicks -- even the band sweats it up!


8) Barton Fink (1991) - The Coen Brothers brilliantly offbeat pastiche of Hollywood in the interwar period -- so hot the walls sweat.


9) Personal Best(1982) - Robert Towne's sports drama gets the sapphic sweat flowing.


10) Apollo 13 (1995) Opie Cunningham's real-life space drama includes overheating capsule -- hot, sweaty stuff!

Film: Gopnik Commentates on Commentary

Joel Schumacher -- "Did someone say batnipples?"

What you won't find online at the New Yorker magazine's website but you will find between the dead treeskin pages of this weeks provocative issue on the arts is a terrific Adam Gopnik essay entitled "The Corrections." Gopnik looks at the world of abridged books, what's lost and gained in the process of cutting the fat and getting to the meat of a classic like Melville's Moby Dick. One of the funniest parts of the piece explores the opposite -- a form in which more is added rather than subtracted -- director's commentaries on movie DVDs. In particular his description of hoity-toity director Michael Apted's commentary for the James Bond film he did -- The World is Not Enough -- bought cackles of laughter from behind my bathroom door (I'm not ashamed to say that I multitask whilst on the toilet). It put me in mind of the time I had to review the DVD of Batman & Robin for the newspaper I worked for. This, the fourth in the Batman series is by any measure an execrable piece of filmmaking to the point that it's a frequent punchline for star George Clooney when talking about his career missteps. Yet the commentary by Joel Schumacher, who as a director was a great set designer, was quite funny and insightful. For the most part the story he tells is of studio intent on milking as much toy revenue as possible out of the film and trying to wedge as many of the potential toys as possible into each scene. As Gopnik points out in the case of Apted -- a respected documentarian (he did the Up series -- 28 Up etc.) -- a bland or even lousy film is given resonance and meaning when we see it through the eyes of the director's struggle to make something meaningful or resignation to the sweet ministrations of commerce.

Movie/Music News: Scorsese to Direct George Harrison Doc

George Harrison: Indian phase? What Indian phase?

Martin Scorsese will direct a wide-ranging biography of former Beatle George Harrison, who dies of lung cancer in 2001. The doc, which will be prepped for thetrical release, will cover all aspects of Harrison's career including wit his band, as a solo artist, a film financier and activist. Scorsese already has an impressive roster of music docs under his belt including The Band's film The Last Waltz, the upcoming Rolling Stones film Shine a Light and the acclaimed Bob Dylan biodoc No Direction Home.

Film: The Lives of Ulrich Mühe

The late Ulrich Mühe listens to Darkside of The Moon the way it was meant to be heard...

EW.com has a great interview with Best Foreign Film Oscar winner The Lives of Others director Florian Henckel von Donnersmarck about his star Ulrich Mühe, who died recently of stomach cancer. It's well worth reading about the political power of art.